The History of that Ingenious Cowpoke Dan K. Honkey of the Panhandle

Abstract

In a small podunk town in the West Texas Panhandle (I won't bother you with its name) there lived, not too long ago, one of those rednecks who keep a shotgun in the gun-rack, an old spit can, a broken down truck, and a mangy old cow dog. Most of his income went into his bowl of chili (which contained a good bit more beans than meat), the old stale beef jerky he ate most nights, Friday's baked beans and cornbread with Saturday's leftovers, and at times a skinny old dove left from the previous year's hunting season. All the rest was used for his plaid western shirts, and wrangler breeches he wore out on the town (with ostrich skin boots to match). He lived with a housekeeper, who was forty, and a niece who was still under the legal drinking age, plus a neighbor boy who ran errands for him and spent more time fixing his old truck than he did driving it.